The Terrible Song Awards

-"Take My Breath Away" by Berlin
-"Hotel California" by blah blah
-"Barbie Girl" by whoever
-"Tick Tock" by Ke$ha-- although maybe it's just her voice and her singing that enpukify me. I'm trying to imagine if it could work sung by someone else. (Morissey? What a thought.)
-"Baby Baby" by Amy Grant
-the entire Titianic soundtrack (the rest of it is EVEN WORSE than Celine Dion!)
-the hits of Huey Lewis (I can't speak to his non-hits, though I would like to never hear those, either)
-"I've Had the Time of My Life," Black Eyed Peas version. Not that the original was good, either, but the Peas managed to bring out an extra-special "blech" quality. And note that this is (at least) the third item on this list from a movie soundtrack. Hmm.
Also note that each song I hate is like the opposite of a Lars Von Trier movie.

---and many more. I suppose I shouldn't think about this stuff so much... or let people know specific ways they can torture me.

"It's easy to be a man."

This goes out to my Abortioneer comrades.



You said it, Tecate.

Slightly less Stupid

After reading one of the dumbest articles ever, on a web site purporting to be for "smart and beautiful women"-- and no, I'm not going to name it or link to it, because they don't deserve any more traffic, for whatever a mention on here is worth-- I have decided I need to post here more often. Because I couldn't possibly endumbenify the general level of conversation on the internet any further.

Here's to making it a little smarter out there.

P.S. If you're wondering, the article that prompted this was yet another pointless piece on how women should be more nicer and less bossypants in order not to scare off the menfolk. I'd add it to the list of Depressing Shit if I didn't want to avoid giving it more traffic.

Sounds like a bummer (Depressing shit, Part 4 in a series)

I recommend you see Part 1 and read my original disclaimer here; now here's installment 4:

Haven't seen these movies, don't think I want to:
An American Crime
Biutiful
Burma VJ
Precious
The Sea Inside/The Dancer Upstairs (Am I confused? All these depressing-sounding Javier Bardem flicks run together for me...)
The Second Circle

The Unloved (more child abuse!)
The Walker

song (definitely depressing):
"Is That All There Is?"

And here's Part 2 of the series, in case you missed it...
And Part 3.


More coming sooner or later! Please comment if you have anything to add. I am always looking for more depressing shit to avoid.


 

even more depressing shit (Part 3 of our series)

I recommend you see Part 1 and read my original disclaimer here (if you haven't already); now here's installment 3: 

Movies:
A.I.
Capturing the Friedmans
Project Nim (haven't seen this, don't want to ever see it, I don't need to be more depressed.)
Yesterday (having to do with AIDS)

And some of my GOING COMMANDO! co-host Mae Aswell's depressing movie suggestions:
House of Sand and Fog
Midnight Cowboy
Mystic River

song: "All By Myself" (also Mae's suggestion)

...and a few other things that depress me, outside of the categories above: 
-the guitar wankers at Guitar Center
-most comments on Youtube videos (and on most other mass-viewed web sites)
-the Disneyland monorail, especially the part where you see the parking lot


And here's a bonus-- a link to the original posting of our GOING COMMANDO! podcast episode in which Mae Aswell and I do a lot of expounding on cultural consumables that depress us:

5-4-11 GOING COMMANDO! with MAE ASWELL & MAREN McC...
(At least I think that's the right episode. If not, I'll have to relisten to some episodes to figure it out, and that SHOULDN'T be depressing!  I'm pretty sure the subject comes up on more than one episode, knowing me.)

And here's Part 2 of the series, in case you missed it.

More coming sooner or later! Please comment if you have anything to add.

My tag!

See??

Because I have to.

Team handball

Russian cave wedding

Petting time