Sunday, September 30, 2012

Annie & Janny & The Nature of The Universe


[A jubilant Janny enters dancing and semi-chanting, semi-yelling.]

Janny: Auntie Ann-ee, I'm in FOUR DEE, and I'm SO nice! I'm in FOOOOOUURR DEEEEEE! Auntie Ann-EE!

Auntie Annie: Congratulations, Janny! We're so proud of you!

J [in a sing-song way]: I KNOW, I KNOW, Aunt-ee, it's all, it's all because of me, 'cause I'm in FOOOOOUUR DEE!

A: I'm pleased that that spell we cast worked so well.

J: A spell?! You didn't have shit-snack to do with this. It's all me! I made myself 4D!

A: And the spell helped a great deal, young lady.

J: You are trying to mess me up! You want to take this away from me, saying it was all 'cause of you and your big, smelly "SPELL" powers. You don't have powers on me!

A: You just go right on ahead and keep believing that, Janny.

[Janny stops jiggling around, crestfallen. Her face falls, and she sits down to mope.]

J: Daaaaamn, Auntie!

A: That's alright, child. It doesn't mean you're any less four-dimensional than you were. It just means you can't take all the credit for it.

J: But DAMN! DAMN! I wanted it to be me!

A: Of course. I know all about it. Back when I was about your age and I first realized I might be three-dimensional, there was no stopping me.

J: SO?!

A: And then I discovered, with time, that I can't just take credit for things that are not my own doing.

J: What? I'm 4D and it IS because of me.

A: No, honey, you only think it is. It's like being proud of yourself for being tall or for having pretty eyes. You didn't work for your four-dimensionality, so you have no right to go around saying it's all because of you. And besides, you have me to thank for casting that spell.

J [groans]: Unnhhh. That's boring. Now what do I do?

A: I'll teach you to cast spells yourself, and then you can cast them on other people.

J: For reals?

A: Sure! And then we can turn all the people in the world into invisible ants, and make them fear death, AND make them wonder if there's a God and what is the meaning of life!

J: OK!

[Then there's a sudden POOF of fog and we see no more. You know, like a black out. And it goes on, and on...]

The End!

---

[See the site of National Sketch Writing Month for the meaning of all this (up to a point).]